This graphic, by Kristin Wiens, nicely illustrates the meaning of a well-known quote. In relation to Shanker Self-Reg®, “behaviour is communication” serves as a reminder to look “deeper,” to see what is behind behaviour that concerns us.
We often see troubling behaviour as an outcome; the result of a “bad decision,” or a bad “choice.” However, a) not all behaviour is chosen, some is caused by excess stress, and b) all behaviour communicates. It tells us something about a person’s inner state, the stress they are under and their needs.
Learning to read behaviour as communication can help us devote less energy to reacting to correct behaviour. Then we can devote our energy to understanding behaviour so we can help children shape their behaviour in positive ways that build children’s self-efficacy, resilience and relationships.
Let’s start by reframing explosive behaviour.
