Blog by Self-Reg Learning Facilitator Certificate Program Alumni, Stela Haralala
Stress, like rain, can be unpredictable. Some days, it’s a light drizzle, barely noticeable. Other times, it pours relentlessly, soaking through everything. When it rains, we adjust. We grab an umbrella, wear a raincoat, or put on waterproof boots to stay dry. Sometimes, we run for cover or simply wait it out. Over time, as we experience rain, we learn to check the forecast and prepare accordingly.
What if we applied the same thinking to stress? What if we recognized the signs? Instead of letting it drench us, we prepared for it? What if we learned how to ease its weight before it overwhelmed us?
For a long time, I didn’t think this way. I ran from stress just as I would run from the rain. I thought if I moved fast enough, if I ignored it long enough, I could avoid the downpour. It doesn’t work that way. The more I ran, the harder it poured.
Mornings were my daily downpour; rushing to prepare lunch, squeezing in a few sips of coffee while hurrying my child out the door, all while feeling the pressure of the day ahead. I was moving at full speed, pushing both of us through a whirlwind of stress, expecting her to keep up. Until Self-Reg—a way to pause, reflect, understand, reduce and respond.
It started with a small shift: waking up 30 minutes earlier. To do that, I needed to go to bed earlier. So I adjusted my evenings, rearranged my priorities, and suddenly, that one change set off a domino effect. Stressors feed on each other, but so does reducing them. Reducing one gave me the space to reduce another, creating a ripple effect of relief.
I began my mornings differently. I took deep breaths before diving into the day. I drank my coffee in peace instead of gulping it down between tasks. I stopped yelling reminders from the kitchen and instead woke my daughter with a gentle voice. I walked her through her routine, not just beside her but with her. I let go of the guilt that came with ordering takeout when needed instead of making a home-cooked meal. Balance is the key. It wasn’t just about getting things done; it was about how I felt while doing them. The truth is, nothing reduces my stress more than seeing my daughter smile in the morning and evenings instead of wearing an anxious face. One small shift, multiple benefits.
Now, when I feel stress creeping in; when my breath shortens and my mind spirals; I pause. I take a breath. I ask myself: Why? Why now? Just that moment of awareness changes everything. My heartbeat slows. My breath deepens and gives me a choice to respond.
Some mornings, the sky is still dark. We know the rain is coming. But now, we prepare. We put on our rain jackets. We lace up our boots. We take a deep breath together and wrap ourselves in a warm hug. And just like that, it feels lighter.
Stress, like rain, will always come and go. But learning to explore to reduce stress has made all the difference. It’s a journey, adding something new to your learning each time is helping you see a ray of sunshine.
Begin Your Self-Reg Journey Today
Have you had your eye on Self-Reg content for a while now? Are you still struggling to bring Self-Reg into your home, your classroom, your workplace? Deeper Self-Reg practice comes from learning, reflection and conversation gained through our Certificate Programs. Check out the next cohorts starting HERE.
