By Kristina Schwartz, RECE a Self-Reg Learning Facilitator’s Program Alumni
Reflecting on Dr. Stuart Shanker’s Self-Reg approach has been eye-opening. It has taught me that stress isn’t just about feeling overwhelmed; it’s about anything that drains our energy and requires recovery. This perspective has completely changed how I understand my daughter’s experiences.
Last school year, my daughter, who was in Grade 11 and 16 years old, competed at Skills Ontario. She found her stride in carpentry and construction tech classes, earning recognition from teachers who once saw her as lazy and unmotivated. Watching those same teachers celebrate her achievements at regionals and then provincials was a proud moment for all of us.
Carpentry demands skill, patience, perseverance, and intelligence. The tech class environment, with its movement and focus on safety, was a perfect fit for her. There’s a unique pride in creating something with your hands, a stark contrast to the often monotonous world of math and English classes. This got me thinking about how different environments and activities affect stress levels across the five domains—biological, emotional, cognitive, social, and prosocial.
Biological Domain
In her carpentry classes, my daughter is constantly moving, which helps regulate her energy and focus. In contrast, sitting still in academic classes can lead to restlessness and discomfort, adding to her stress. The physical activity in her tech classes helps her stay engaged and reduces stress, whereas the sedentary nature of traditional classrooms can be a stressor.
Emotion Domain
Understanding stress in the emotion domain involves recognizing how much energy it takes to handle strong emotions. In carpentry, the pride and satisfaction she feels in her work help her manage this energy effectively. But in traditional academic classes, frustration and anxiety over difficult or monotonous concepts can drain her energy. The biological and emotion responses are intertwined, so when she’s struggling emotionally in an academic setting, it affects her overall energy and ability to cope, increasing her stress. Managing these emotions can be exhausting, impacting her ability to focus and learn.
Cognitive Domain
My daughter is intelligent and capable of handling cognitive tasks in subjects like math and English. However, the stressors in these environments make it hard for her to focus and stay motivated. For example, the pressure to complete a past-due task can be overwhelming and cause her to shut down. Carpentry engages her problem-solving skills in a practical, hands-on way that she finds stimulating. In contrast, the cognitive load in traditional academic subjects can be mentally exhausting, especially if the material doesn’t resonate with her learning style. This cognitive load can quickly deplete her mental energy and increase her stress.
Social Domain
In her tech classes, there’s a strong sense of camaraderie and teamwork, which she enjoys. In more traditional classes, she might feel isolated or judged, especially if she’s struggling with the material, leading to social stress. The supportive environment in her tech classes contrasts sharply with the competitive and sometimes isolating atmosphere of her academic classes, which can heighten her social stress.
Prosocial Domain
My daughter often worries that her teachers don’t like her or think poorly of her. Walking into these classrooms with such feelings consumes a lot of energy. This prosocial stress affects her ability to engage and perform well, as she constantly feels judged and misunderstood. The effort to overcome these perceptions and prove herself consumes significant emotional and mental resources, adding another layer of stress that impacts her overall well-being and academic performance.
Recognizing these hidden stressors makes me wish her teachers had taken the time to understand her stress responses across these domains. If they’d viewed her behaviour through the Self-Reg lens, they might have seen beyond the surface and recognized the underlying stressors affecting her performance.
In conclusion, understanding stress through the Self-Reg framework has taught me to look deeper and recognize the complexity of stress responses. By identifying and addressing stressors in all five domains, we can better support individuals in finding their paths to success and well-being. My daughter’s journey in carpentry and construction tech is a testament to the power of recognizing and responding to stress in a holistic, compassionate way. This experience has not only transformed her self-view as a student but has also deepened my understanding of the importance of seeing beyond the obvious and addressing the root causes of stress.
She’s not lazy when procrastinating or ‘carelessly’ writing a test…she’s stressed.
