Services for Parents
The TMC Parent Education and Consultation Service has been designed for families who need a bit more support and who would like to go deeper into the theory and practice of Self-Reg.
For more information contact: firstname.lastname@example.org
Services for Organizations
- Customized Self-Reg consulting
- Self-Reg 5 Domain Environmental Scans
- Demonstrations Site Development Support
- Organizational alignment analysis
Policy analysis and development
Monitoring, evaluation and accountability framework consulting
For more information contact: email@example.com
Our TMC Values Underpin all Our Services.
Value #1: Self-Reg is a universal platform
This value is relatively straightforward. It means that Self-Reg relates to all aspects of the work of caring for and teaching children, and supporting the people who work with children. In other words, Self-Reg is not just a tool for understanding and working with children, classrooms or schools with problems. Even though Self-Reg may be very useful in those settings, it is primarily an approach to understanding people, building relationships and helping people and communities be their best selves in various circumstances. And by calling Self-Reg a platform rather than a program or intervention, we mean that it is the foundation underlying everything we do – communicating, working with people, remediation, discipline, supporting mental health, addressing special needs and building community.
Value #2: Shanker Self-Reg is a process not a program
What’s important here is that Self-Reg does not come in a handy little package or manual that you open up, learn, implement and then you’re done. Self-Reg is an ongoing process of learning and growth about how we can understand and support people, including helping them with their problems in behaviour, mood, thinking and learning. In other words, one of the biggest errors we can make is thinking that we’ve “got Self-Reg” and now all we have to do is use the method as taught. In fact, the learning, readjusting and trial and error probably never stop. That’s partly because people and the situations they are in change constantly. Society and the demands it puts on people, keeps changing as well. The stressors that affect children evolve as well. Stressors such as cyberbullying and responding to texts when you should be asleep didn’t exist 20 years ago. What new stressors might be affecting children ten years from now? Children, and their self-regulation skills also change as they grow and encounter new challenges, obstacles and influences. Moreover, the science of Self-Reg is evolving as new research emerges to enhance our understanding of self-regulation and how it develops. Last, but not least, Self-Reg itself will evolve as new people join the conversation and contribute their unique knowledge and experience about putting Self-Reg into practice. In other words, if Self-Reg was a fixed program, it would be out of date very quickly. The process is ongoing. It never ends.
Value #3: ALL people are capable of self-regulation, no matter the age, stage or ability level
This one can be taken at face value. The point is that whether someone is old or young, highly educated or uneducated, a prison inmate or a saint: regardless of their IQ or state of physical or mental health, they are capable of self-regulation on a meaningful and helpful level. In fact, all people do self-regulate whether they were taught to or not. Everybody, even people who happen to be pretty good at self-regulating, can still learn more.
Value #4: Each individual, family, culture and community holds unique Self-Reg expertise
TMC has developed a model and method for understanding self-regulation and teaching Self-Reg strategies. But we did not invent self-regulation. In fact, people have been self-regulating and co-regulating in various ways for centuries. Understandings, expertise and strategies about self-regulation vary from person to person and culture to culture. We need to honour and support the self-regulation knowledge and strategies of different families, cultures and communities and be ready to learn from their expertise.
Value #5: There is no single set way to do Self-Reg
Although Self-Reg is described as a method with steps to follow, that does not mean that there is a best or ideal way to carry out the method. Everyone who does Self-Reg brings their own experiences, knowledge, beliefs, biases and personalities to the table. Just as people have different ways of calming themselves, they will have different ways of calming others. Some people may be “naturals” who just seem to get Self-Reg, while others may take longer to figure Self-Reg out. Just as every individual is unique, every individual’s way of doing Self-Reg will be unique.
Value #6: There are no quick fixes, Self-Reg is a continual and reflective process
We live in a world where people are constantly trying to sell us quick fixes. Just do X, Y or Z and “your child will behave,” or “you’ll lose weight and keep it off,” or “you’ll protect yourself against dementia.” Fairly quick successes, or perhaps more accurately, encouraging breakthroughs, sometimes happen. But in the real world, change tends to happen slowly and incrementally. And, as anyone who has raised or worked with children knows, even if you are successful with one of your child’s issues, that usually just gives you a little breathing room until the next issue comes along. That’s often true with adults as well. That’s why constant, ongoing reflection, and the learning that it enables, are such important parts of Self-Reg. Although it would be nice to think in terms of getting “there,” in truth, you’re never really “there.” However, Self-Reg can help make the process, of getting “there” better.
Value #7 Self-Reg is for everyone, it’s not just about children and youth
People rightly want to support and enhance child development, because that seems (and is) the best way to promote the long-term well-being of society. But consider two things. One is that stress and other challenges are as inevitable in life as death and taxes. People may deal with trauma, mental illness, health problems, misfortune, and the effects of aging at various points in their lives. Therefore, grounding living, learning and mutual support in self-regulation is important no matter how old you are. Secondly, and this relates directly to Value #8, adults will be best able to help regulate children (and also to model and teach Self-Reg), if those adults are regulated themselves.
Value #8: The well-being of children is inseparable from the well-being of all the critical adults in their lives.
This value brings to mind the old saying: “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” That statement speaks to an elemental truth. People who look after and see to the well-being of others – mothers, fathers, teachers, early childhood educators, nurses, doctors, mental health professionals – will be most able to address the needs of others, if they themselves stay regulated, happy and mentally healthy most of the time. So if we’re looking at how to enhance self-regulation in children, we can never forget that we must also look at and address the self-regulation and well-being of the people who care for them.