Self-Reg has a number of popular slogan mostly quotes, beliefs and questions from Stuart Shanker. Here are some of them; “No such thing as a bad kid”, “See A child differently and you’ll see a different child.” Another oft-repeated Self-Reg phrase is “Why and Why Now?”, questions Stuart urges us to ask when confronted with troubling behaviour.
Delving Deeper
Yet this question has seldom, if ever, been discussed at length, often presented as if its meaning and utility are obvious. And perhaps this is so. But maybe it’s worth pausing and taking a look at this key Self-Reg question.
Today’s Question:
What does Why and Why Now mean to you, and how has this question shaped your Self-Reg learning and practice journey?
In the comments below share you thoughts on this key Self-Reg question such as how and when you have used it, and how it has help you understand and respond more effectively to the behaviour of a child, adult or yourself.
Additional Resources:
Blog by Stuart Shanker: We All Need to Start Asking Why
Self-Reg Show Podcast, episode 2: Why? Why Now?
The questions WHY and WHY NOW have transformed my personal and professional self-regulation journey, becoming a guiding philosophy that has reshaped the way I navigate life.This shift has been particularly transformative as I explore my stressors with curiosity and develop strategies to manage them. Moreover, this lens extends to how I engage with others, fostering a non-judgemental atmosphere of support enriched with compassion.
In my role working with children, embodying this “philosophy” involves assuming the role of a calming presence when the children encounter stress. By maintaining a poised demeanour, “soft” body language and a soothing tone, I strive to be their anchor during challenging moments. I always find myself contemplating how the environment could potentially influence children’s ability to regulate and how to diminish their stress. Whether it involves too many transitions during the school day, chilly weather, a noisy hallway, not sufficient play…
I am deeply invested in nurturing the “interbrain relationship” with the children, recognizing the profound impact our actions have on their early years path. Stuart’s insightful quote, “see a child differently, you see a different child”, resonates deeply with me, encapsulating the essence of my commitment to children. As an Early Childhood educator, I wield the ability to shape a child’s trajectory and this responsibility hinges upon my perception of them. Embracing a paradigm shift, I understand that each child harbours great potential, competence and capabilities. I need to show up for them and ask myself WHY and WHY NOW?
Thanks for your comment, Mariela! I love reading about your learning and your thinking as you work with children. I also love the quote, “See a child differently, you see a different child.” Do you have any experiences that you can share where this philosophy impacted on your view of the child and that child’s trajectory? I’d love to hear more about your experiences.
Aviva